I have been feeling a bit hopeless and worndown over the last couple of weeks. I started this week very aware that I had begun to shut my heart away from some situations here, thinking in man's wisdom that that was how to protect it. God, thankfully knows better and gave me a week full of hope.
On Tuesdays I work at Silver Hope, a church based craft business that is providing jobs for some otherwise unemployed ladies from the community. We mainly focus on beading and sewing, both work that is straining on the eyes. This week we had a lady visiting from England who had brought with her a whole load of reading glasses of different strengths. It was wonderful to watch the ladies try them on, finding a pair that helped them to see better, then parade around the room showing them off whilst praising God for His provision. Such a simple thing - a pair of cheap reading glasses from Primark, but it's hard to imagine the impact of such a gift on these ladies. In some cases it will literally transform their lives. Apparently Paulina was so blessed by the gift that she shared about it in her cell group this week as a testimony to God's faithfulness.
On Tuesday evenings since January Pula and I have been leading a new christians course for teenagers who have just been saved. This week we were talking about baptism in the Holy Spirit, and we had the privilege of getting to pray for the gift of tongues for them and hear them speaking in their heavenly languages for the first time.
On Wednesday we had a Mapheo leaders meeting. We took turns in sharing stories from the last year of what we've seen God do in the kids and special memories we have with them. It was so encouraging. I think sometimes we end up with compassion fatigue here - we're so constantly surrounded by suffering, the kids lives are seemingly endlessly sad, and you can end up protecting your heart from it by refusing to think about it. But when I look back over the year and remember what God has done, it gives me hope for those situations which I have at times chosen not to dwell on as they're too sad. Some of the memories we shared were:
1. Seeing Malefu (her name means 'mother of death' which I think gives you a clue as to her horrific home life) smile and giggle for the first time.
2. Seeing Lerato (one of the girls I visit) get baptised. Since her baptism Lerato has been transformed. I used to have to insist on her answering me when I said hello to her, now she's waiting for me every Mapheo and church to give me a hug!
3. Seeing our older boys who used to be real trouble makers respond to clear boundaries and love. They're not always well behaved now (they're still kids, and kids from tough homes) but they understand the consequences, and one has even shared with a leader that he understands that we punish bad behaviour because we love him and want to show him the right way to live.
4. Seeing Marietta who's about 11 change from being a worldly would be teenager back into a child. It's as if God has restored to her the innocence which had been taken away at far too young an age.
5. Seeing Sawana respond to love and actually desire physical affection from us.
6. Seeing the whole of the Nkosikulu family saved and added to the church. Their home life has been transformed from drunkeness and abuse to a place where we love to hold our cell group!
7. Seeing little Ben who's probably 2, feel so safe at Mapheo that every session, given half a chance, he falls asleep in our arms. He even asks to go to sleep now! He comes from one of the toughest situations we know, is covered in infections, is always filthy, but has stolen all our hearts.
8. Seeing Lebote go from being quite a shy and introverted little boy to being the first to dance at church often entertaining us with his awesome moves which he performs without realising that he's centre-stage at the front of the church with everyone watching him.
9. Seeing our older boys really know Jesus. Especially seeing Lerato and Sankwela worshipping Him.
10. Seeing Puleng change from a sullen, stropy little girl to this term winning the prize for always being at Mapheo and always being on time. She's now ever ready with a smile and a hug.
And that's just some of the endless stories we could tell of children who we've seen God at work in. I'm so glad that He chooses to use us to show His love and faithfulness.
Yesterday we took the kids who had been at Mapheo nearly every session for their end of term treat. It was great as it was a different group of children to those who normally end up on the trip. There were some of our more difficult kids there so we were encouraged that they love Mapheo even if they don't always show it! We took them up to town to a restaurant for a milkshake and chips. The restaurant also has a play area at the back with a climbing frame and pet rabbits so we all had a good time. The kids particularly loved flinging themselves off the climbing frame at Jeremy who would catch them. Unfortunately Popina who's 3 didn't realise that you had to actually warn Jeremy that you were about to jump and just went for it! Thankfully Jeremy managed to catch him, but only once he was literally inches from the ground!
So this week has definitely been one of hope restored for me. I hope that you are encouraged by reading this that God is always faithful, always working even when we can't see the outward signs, and that He truly does love the poor and downtrodden of this world.
Friday, 26 March 2010
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